Have you ever thought about joining a gang? I don’t mean some group of kids at school calling themselves a gang, but do nothing more than hang out together. I mean a group of kids and young adults you know are more into committing crimes, scaring people in your town or city, and defending some area of the city as their “turf” even if it means injuring or killing someone. These are people with no limits to what they’ll do as long as they can “be in charge” of their own lives. They may tell you some things which sound great, but they have no respect for the people around them.
      Do you really think a gang is going to accept you for who you are as a person? One of the biggest draws of gangs is they’ll tell you they’re not like other people and they’ll let you be you. Once you’re in the gang, that all changes. If you like wearing all black all of the time, you’ll have to change your wardrobe if the gang color isn’t black. If you would never think about breaking the law, you may have to put that idea away when the gang decides you have to commit a crime as part of your initiation. If you don’t like fighting, you’ll soon have to fight to keep other gangs away from your “turf” or as a way to get revenge on another gang for hurting one of your “boys“. If you like the person you are, even if the people around you don’t seem to accept you, a gang is going to expect you to change into what they see as the perfect gang member.
      Will they really give you a place where you feel a part of a family? A lot of kids feel ignored and rejected by their parents and other family members so they look for a group which will pay attention to them and show them some respect. A gang may defend you and give you a sense of being part of family, but only as long as you do what the leader and senior members tell you to do. The moment you question an order, refuse to do something which goes against your nature, or hesitate to defend one of your “brothers” (or “sisters”), that sense of family will disappear. You’re either a part of the family by doing everything the gang does or you’re an outsider. And don’t think the gang will stand behind you if you’re arrested by the police. If you get arrested, you’re on your own.
      Are you willing to do anything to continue to be a part of a gang? By anything I mean destroy other people’s property with graffiti, steal money to support the gang, seriously injure someone because they didn’t give the proper hand signal, or kill a rival gang member because they just happen to be on the wrong side of town. Unless going to jail for your new family is your idea of a “field trip”, gang life isn’t for you.
      Do you know what happens if you decide to get out of a gang? Unless you move far enough away from gang territory, leaving the gang isn’t an easy thing to do. Most of the time, a gang is going to let you know how “unhappy” they are about you leaving the “family”. If you’re lucky, you leave with some bad bruises and a few broken bones. Sometimes the only way out is if you’re dead. Do I need to explain that way out any better?
      Why not start your own group? In most towns, there are enough kids you can find a group that really accepts you for the way you dress and act. Maybe the group hasn’t been organized, but you know other kids with the same likes and dislikes as yours. Get together with these kids so you have a group that, unlike gangs, really cares about your concerns, hobbies, you’re goals in life, and how you’re doing. Be a part of a group which cares more about just being your friend then seeing you as just another person to give them strength in numbers. Create a group which is more interested in staying out of trouble instead of one bragging about how many crimes they commit. If you take the time to look at the kids around you, you’ll find some who want to be your friend even if you’re not exactly like them.